Kutheni ndingaze ndiphinde nditshintshe ibhayisekile yam yeHybridi eneminyaka eli-15 ubudala

Ukugqibela kwam ukuziva ngale fashoni ngebhayisekile yam bendikade ndibuyi-9; yayinguSchwinn oluhlaza-otyhafileyo, iti eluhlaza okwesibhakabhaka, kwaye ndazenza ngasese ngokungathi lihashe. Ayilulo naliphi na ihashe: I-Schwinn yayingu-Godolphin Arabian ovela kuMarguerite Henry's Kumkani woMoya, incwadi ndiyijongisisile kangangokuba i-varsity yethala leencwadi kuye kwafuneka ndiyikhuphe kwiminwe yam kwaye indazise ukuba ndifuna enye into yokufunda.

Ngobusuku basehlotyeni ndandihamba ngenyawo ndisiya kwincam yebhloko, ndicinga ukuba ndishiyeke ngasemva kwinqanaba lomdyarho wamahashe elinokuthi lithathe isigqibo sokuya phambili kohlobo. I-flip efanelekileyo kwi-nook, eyiyo kanye enye yendlela ngaphezulu, emva koko, esiya kolula, sakhabela kwigiye enkulu. Ihashe lam ndaphinde ndagidizela saya e-Ewing Avenue kwithambeka eliyingozi njengokuba iqela lale migulukudu lafika apha ezinzwaneni, livuyisana nomfanekiso omde de sayokufika esiphelweni, kwikhaya losapho lwam, siphumelele.

Ibhayisekile esisiseko inokuba yinto oyifunayo.

Uninzi lwexesha elide kamva, uhambo lwam luyiTrk 7300 Multitrack, indoda eyapheliswa ngo-2012, nangona ndicinga ngenzala yayo, nangona umgca weArabia uthwala abakhweli uloyiso, kwindawo ethile. “IMultitrack” ibonakala ngathi ayisosidima, ayisiyonto ithile, kwaye ikwangoku: Ayinazo iintlobo ezimenyezelayo zeebhayisikile zokubaleka ezithandwa ngamadoda kwiijezi zaseNtaliyane neebhulukhwe ezimfutshane zebhayisekile, kwaye ayikrelekrele njengeebhayisikile zombane ezitshintshela kwimodi yamandla ukuba unqwenela ukuhamba ngenqanawa ngaphandle kokukrola. Ayilulo uhlobo lendalo iibhayisekile ezinobungozi ezihluthwe into enokuyicothisa kancinci, ibhayisekile ilingana ne swimsuit yeArmani kwaye ibiza kakhulu.

Bendihlala ndinomdyarho onamavili amancinci, kwaye ngamanye amaxesha ndandiye ndibambe isiphatho esilahliweyo, ndithambise kwakhona, ndikhumbule ngale mijaho yamahashe yabantwana yenziwe. Nangona kunjalo ngokwenyani, bendihlala ndisiva ukuba umdyarho mkhulu kunento ebendiyifuna. Bendiqhele ukuba ngumkhweli wesixeko, umnini-bhayisekile omnandi, onamandla. I-Trek yibhayisekile emnandi, eyomeleleyo; sikumabinzana amahle.

Ndawushiya ngasemva ndaya eNew York Metropolis ndisuka eLos Angeles kwiminyaka eli-11 eyadlulayo, ngenxa yokucinga ukuba ndiza kube ndigqithile iinyanga, hayi iminyaka. Nangona kunjalo bendihlala ndinesiphene, kwaye ekugqibeleni indawo yokuhlala ethe nkqo ithathe umoya wam, ndiye ndabhabha ndaza ndayithumela ngasempumalanga ibhayisekile. Kwakusasa ngeCawa kusasa besibetha indlela yokujonga ibhayisekile eNtshona ukuqinisekisa ukuba ndingahamba ngebhayisekile malunga neebhloko ezili-100 ukusuka e-Chelsea ukuya kwikhampasi yaseKholeji yaseColumbia kwindawo ebendiyifundisile, ukuba ndikhethe njalo, emva koko ndibuyele apho ndihlala khona.

Nje ukuba ndibuyele kwi-LA yr kwixa elidlulileyo, ndikwazile ukukhumbula ekhaya, ibhayisekile yagqiba uhambo olungqongqo kunye nam. Imelwe ukuba ibe malunga neminyaka eli-15 iphelelwe lixesha ngoku, kodwa ke yeyona nto iphambili kwihashe lokonwaba, kwaye inye into enokuchazwa ngokunyaniseka.

Khange ndiyihoye xa ndiqala ukuthenga kwakhona, ndiphazanyiswe kukudluliselwa kunye nomsebenzi omtsha kraca; yayinamavili amabini athe tyaba kwaye impompo ibekwe endaweni engeyiyo xa kudluliswa. Kodwa ke ngoFebruwari wangaphambili ndaye ndayihamba ndaya kwivenkile ekufuphi yebhayisekile — iintloko ezipholileyo kunale yam eyalelwe ukuba mhlawumbi yayingebobulumko ukulungisa iindlela zebhayisikile LA ngaphambili kunokuba ingcali ingangqina ukuba iziqhoboshi zisindile kudluliso. Ndive ngathi kukuzikhusela: Iibhayisikile ngaphakathi kwefestile bezingumntu onomdla kuzo zonke iindlela, kunye neethegi zexabiso zokutshatisa. Ndicelile le ndoda isemva kwekhawuntari ukuba inokuba nengcinga ngokunika iTrek yam kanye.

Undidubule ngoncumo lwangaphakathi lwe-baseball. Uye wathi, “Yibhayisekile entle,” ingxola ngokwaneleyo ukuze wonke umntu ophakathi evenkileni ayimamele. "Iya kuhlala ngokungapheliyo." Kwiintsuku ezi-4 kamva, ibhayisekile yam entle kwaye sikwazile ukubetha uhola wendlela ngeebhuleki kunye nezixhobo, ndinomoya opheleleyo kunye nomzimba onobunkunkqele.

Beka ecaleni isicatshulwa malunga nokuba ungaze ulibale ukuba ungasikhuba njani isithuthuthu, ngenxa yokuba kukho inyani enkulu ngakumbi apha: Uhlala ukhumbula indlela oziva ngayo ngelixa ukhubekisa isithuthuthu, ungaze ulahlekelwe zizikhumbuzo ezibotshelelwe ubuchule obukhawulezayo bokuba ngaphezu kweselfowuni kunokuba unjalo. Ukuba nesakhono sokuhambisa kunye nokuhambisa ayisiyonto ingako yokufezekisa, nangona kunjalo ukubanakho ukubiza umntu wakho oneminyaka eli-9 ubudala, ukuba ungaziva nje kuphela xa sithetha nomoya opholileyo kodwa uphefumla ngaphambili? Yinto enye leyo.

Kwiiveki nje ezimbalwa, umhlaba njengokuba besisazi ukuba uvaliwe ngenxa yobhubhane, kwaye ukusebenzisa enye yezinto ezininzi endinokuzenza ngokukhuselekileyo, ulwandle lwangaphambili olungenamntu kunye neendlela zebhayisekile, ezitalatweni ebezinga khuselekanga ngenxa yomntu Eqhuba. Ndahamba ukusuka kuhambo lwemizuzu engama-20 ukuya kwii-4 zeemayile, ukuya kwi-6, phantse yonke imihla. Ngelixa iindlela ziphinde zavulwa ngoMandla, bendihlala ndisebenzisa uhambo lweeyure ezili-10, olulula, kwaye ngenxa yoko ibikukusuka kwindawo yam ukuqala entla kwendlela yebhayisekile. Kungekudala okanye kamva ndiza kongeza i-mileage ngendlela engeyiyo; mhlawumbi ndiza kwenza ubungakanani bonke.

Abazali abahamba kum kwindlela yebhayisekile baneentsomi zabo ngaphakathi ukwazisa. Ukupakisha komntu kwiijezi ezintle ngokucacileyo kuphakathi kohlanga olugqitha ilizwe laseTuscan. Abakhweli be-e-bike, ubuncinci kwindawo yam yaseSanta Monica, bakhenkethi abakhawulezayo, bethatha imifanekiso bhanyabhanya njengoko begquma ngaphambili. Phakathi kwabantu abakwiibhayisikile ezintle bayaziwa ngokwaneleyo ukuba banokuxhamla iliso lepaparazzi-ibhayisekile yokuma elilinganayo, okwangoku, yengubo ebomvu enekhaphethi ebomvu.

Kwaye abantu abahamba ngesantya esinye ngaselwandle, masingabajongi, kubonakala ngathi balangazelela ulwandle olungqongqo lwangaphambili, ubulula beebhayisikile ezingenagiya, iziqhoboshi ezijijayo, iburger, iifriji kunye nebhodi yezolwandle.

Mna, ndifuna nje ukugqithisa ngommandla kwisiqeshana, njengokuba ndibuyile umva, ngesithuthuthu esenza le nto ndiyicelayo, inkulu kunele ngokwaneleyo. Umoya ezinweleni zam - kulungile, ngaphakathi kweslifti yokuhamba komoya kwisigcina-ntloko sam - kwaye imvakalelo yokungabi ngaphantsi komhlaba kunesiqhelo ilungile kakhulu namhlanje, emva kokuba simbiwe kakhulu. Nangona kunjalo ndihamba ngokukhawuleza kakhulu, ngokubanzi, ilifa yeenjongo zam zakuqala, nangona kunjalo iTrek iyisingatha ngaphandle okuninzi njenge-wobble, kwaye ayingcikivi ndakugqiba ndaphola ngqo kwisantya esifikelelekayo.

Ukusebenzisa kwam okwangoku kuqale ngokubaluleka: Ndifuna into enye echaphazela intshukumo, ngenxa yokuba ndingenakho ukuhlala ngokungahlaliyo yonke le mini, nangona kunjalo iyakundivumela ukuba ndiphephe abantu endingabaziyo xa ndifumene isibini. Emva koko iimvakalelo eziphelelwe lixesha zangena, kwaye zisebenzisa amaxesha aliqela veki nganye zisebenzisa phantse yonke imihla enye, nokuba ayisiyiyo ikofu yokuphumla kwikhefu leSanta Monica okanye olo hambo lungqonge kwincam yebhayisikile. Ukuqhuba kunikezela ngokusungulwa ngokusisigxina, xa kuncinci okuxabisekileyo.

Elungisiweyo, ayinamsebenzi ukuba ndithatha yiphi indlela, yiflip efanelekileyo ePico Boulevard kufutshane nencam yohambo. Iipico zokufa-eziphelileyo ngaselwandle, ke yinto enye yokubambisa ukubamba umbono wePasifiki kwaye ubone ukuba ngowuphi umbala kule yesibini yesibini. Itshintsha rhoqo; Ndinqwenela ukuqaphela.

Emva koko ndijikeleza isiseko sendlela, umoya wolwandle kwakhona, kwaye ndiphinde ndibaleke kwakhona kwindawo yokuhlala.